In my time as a health coach, I have found that cultivating resilience is the most important guidepost to develop when it comes to implementing changes to the way you eat, move, and live. Developing resilience is the sustaining factor to living a healthy lifestyle.
What is resilience? In Brené Brown's book The Gifts of Imperfection she describes it this way: "Resilience is the ability to overcome adversity. The five most common factors of resilient people:
They are resourceful and have good problem-solving skills.
They are more likely to seek help.
They hold the belief that they can do something that will help them to manage their feelings and to cope.
They have social support available to them.
They are connected with others, such as family or friends."
I highlighted number 3 because this is where the heart of the matter lies. They hold the belief that they can do something about where they are at and know how to cope with things out of their control.
This is what we need when we are choosing to avoid sugar and industrial seed oils. This is what we need in the moment of stress or exhaustion or emotional distress. This is what we need when we need to allow self-compassion after we have missed the mark and need to try again.
A main component of resilience is hope.Hope is not an emotion, but a way of thinking. Hope is a result of goals, pathways, and agency. You are able to set reasonable goals, you can figure out how to reach those goals and you believe in yourself. Tolerance for disappointment, determination, and a belief in self are at the heart of hope.
Another component is reality-checking the messages you are believing. Who says you need to look a certain way. Who says you're worthy only if you reach a certain goal? It's one thing to want to be healthy and live the life YOU want versus comparing yourself to air-brushed or snapchat filtered images.
The third component of resilience is getting familiar with vulnerability and discomfort. It's learning how to feel through things rather than numbing the emotions with food, shopping, alcohol, or busyness.We need to let go of the numbing behaviors and learn how to acknowledge when we are feeling vulnerable or having a negative emotion. When we numb the dark, we also end up numbing the light - the light of joy.
I will stop here because this right here is a lot to unpack. Cultivating resilience...believing you are able to face the hard things and welcome the joy in life will undergird your desire to live a healthy life. If you want someone to come alongside you in this, I'm here. We can meet one-on-one and discover your path to resilience.